Receiving calls used to be a relatively simple affair. One picked up the receiver and said some variation of “hello.”
Placing a call was just as simple: You would pick up the receiver and dial (or press) seven digits and voila!
The process was not without its hazards. You could misdial and make the dreaded “toll call.” Or worse, a child could be playing with the phone. When spotted, the child would be tackled and restrained. That’s because… “Oh my god! He dialed long distance!” That was the greatest fear of a phone owner, although in those days you didn’t actually own your phone. “The Phone Company” did.
There could be other complications. Even in the days before we had to routinely dial that dreaded area code for a local call, we were often vexed with the conundrum of whether we had to dial 9 first when making a call from a business environment. You could be made to feel like an idiot either way, so you were a little hesitant to ask, “Do I have to dial 9 first?” You held your breath.
“Why the hell would you dial 9 first?” remarked some smarmy cubicle dweller. “Just dial the number!”
Busted. You only ask because the last time you tried to make a call from a business, you did “just dial the number” and three digits into the call you got an ear-piercing alert that could be heard across several cubicle prairies. You would invariably be on the receiving end of a cacophony of sarcasm-tinged scoldings of, “You have to dial 9 first!”
We survived. The challenge now is what happens after the call has been successfully launched.
My big peeve these days is not so much the robocalls. Half of them don’t even have a robot at the other end if I answer the call. Somebody somewhere on the other side of the world went to the trouble to set up a computer program that would launch a call that would evade several international robo-detectors, screening systems and other billion-dollar technologies to call Joe Phalon in New Jersey and hang up on him.
We used to do that to kids we didn’t like for laughs. But let’s just suppose the phone rings and it shows one of those clever numbers that matches the first three digits of your number to make you think its friendly.
I’m old school. When I answer the phone, I say “hello” in a jovial manner. Ordinarily, the person at the other end who placed the call would say, “Hi, I’m John and I’m calling on behalf of your local PBA to raise money.” At least the person had responded properly. Then I would ask what number my PBA local is, and when they invariably can’t answer, I know it’s a scam and hang up.
The phone rings again…
I again answer the call with a friendly “hello,” but there is a brief pause and then the caller says “hello?” But I said “hello” before the agent at the call center picked up one of the “live ones.” I respond, “That’s my line.” “What? Hello?” the flustered agent often says. “You called me, I offer a jovial ‘hello,’ now it’s your turn to introduce yourself and explain the reason for your call.”
Now I just hang up. I know I might be throwing away my chance for a tropical vacation to sunny climes, but I’ll live with it.
Joe brings decades of journalism experience to the Ridge View Echo, covering everything from local school boards to the U.S. Supreme Court. A former National Law Journal editor and Columbia Law School press officer, he now enjoys telling community stories in Blairstown, where he lives with his wife, Rose, and their two dachshunds.
- Joe Phalon, Contributing Writerhttps://ridgeviewecho.com/author/joe-phalon-contributing-writer/
- Joe Phalon, Contributing Writerhttps://ridgeviewecho.com/author/joe-phalon-contributing-writer/
- Joe Phalon, Contributing Writerhttps://ridgeviewecho.com/author/joe-phalon-contributing-writer/
- Joe Phalon, Contributing Writerhttps://ridgeviewecho.com/author/joe-phalon-contributing-writer/
